Drag Queens Never Die

Well, after the last couple of rather emotionally heavy blogs, it's certainly time for one that's a little more lighthearted, isn't it? I've been meaning to write about this for awhile but simply didn't have the right photos to accompany it. And, really, it's all about the photos. It really would make no sense without them. Not that I'm claiming this will make sense with them, but you get the picture. hahahahaha "get the picture"!! Oh, gosh, I just slay me!

So, here's where our story starts...once upon a time there was a girl addicted to reality shows. OK, not ALL reality shows but quite a few. She will admit to the fact that it all started with the first season of The Real World back in 1992. For a girl that couldn't get enough of psychology and sociology classes in college, this show was a dream come true. A grand social experiment played out on Wednesday night at 9! Hurray! Unfortunately, after the second season it all kind of fell to crap.

But then, as if Heaven had heard her prayers, Survivor appeared! This was even better! More people! A scheming game mentality! No food, no lights, no motor cars, not a single luxury! Like Robinson Crusoe, it's primitive as can be!

**Side note - if you didn't get that reference, then you clearly did not grow up in a time when 60's reruns were all you had to watch after school each day.

As I was saying, Survivor burst on the scene and she entered nirvana. With it's success, though, a multitude of other reality shows hit the scene, most of which, she could entirely do without. But, then it happened. She found herself unwittingly being consumed by shows she never thought she would be watching...America's Next Top Model, Design Star, Top Design, Biggest Loser, Amazing Race, Project Runway, Tabatha's Salon Takeover, Shear Genius...the list goes on.

As painful as it is to admit, I confess that I am said girl. Yes, I could watch marathons of any one of the above mentioned shows and be a happy camper. The icing on my cake is still Survivor, though. I'm rather rabid about watching that on Thursday nights. I have to admit that I only watched the first half of the season premier last night, though. I can watch the other half on On Demand today and I really didn't want to miss Jim finally proposing to Pam on The Office, which I was sure was going to happen (and it did) and it was well worth it.

Anyway, what does this all have to do with drag queens, you ask? It is part of the title after all and all I've done is rattle on about reality TV. Well, several weeks ago on Project Runway they did a challenge where they had to design for various drag queens. It was one of my favorite episodes because, and here's another tidbit of my warped psyche, I'd love to be a drag queen. Oh, to be a man and 6 feet tall and dressing like a woman! Have you ever seen Connie and Carla? Not that great of a movie but LOVE it! The hair, the makeup, the outfits, the SHOES! I recommend the movie Kinky Boots, too, by the by. It's based on a true story and, if you love shoes and drag queens, it's a must see. I digress...

So, Project Runway...drag queens...fabulous outfits... So the guest judge for the episode is Rupaul. I love her. Beautiful. Spicy attitude. Amazing body. Great voice. I was excited to see the diva at the end of the show. But then they showed her. My God in Heaven! WHAT has happened to her? I mean, it's been awhile since I've seen her, but wow! She's certainly looked better. The disturbing thing, though, is that the first thing I thought of when I saw here was the morlocks from the movie Time Machine. Gads! Judge for yourself!

I mean, REALLY! The hair is rather similar, the sunken cheeks, the mouth. My God, they're even wearing the same necklace!!!! I still love her, though. Even though she's a morlock wearing makeup. And, now I know that drag queens never die. They just become morlocks.

Friends Are Friends Forever...Sometimes

So, I'm at one of my new part time gigs today, which is cleaning for a family that lives across town. They are a young couple (translated = younger than me) and have a little girl that is about a year and a half old. They own an advertising firm and work from home and the balance between work and housework was not balancing so well so that leads to me being in their home cleaning.

This morning I'm there cleaning and I'm bustling around doing dishes and floors and laundry and toy pickup, etc. There is a VeggieTales CD in the stereo and I'm listening to kids' songs and church youth group type songs that I haven't heard in ages. Then, on comes the VT version of Michael W. Smith's song Friends Are Friends Forever. Not to date myself but I was at that MWS concert when he released that...ahem...album. And, yes, it really was an ALBUM. I think I still have it, too. Well, it was a little weird to hear the Veggie crew singing it to begin with, but I also don't think I've really listened to that song in over 20 years. It's a sweet, make you bust out in tears song and, if memory serves, it was written in response to a letter about a young girl who had passed away and the friends she left behind. Thus the lyrics, which, if you aren't familiar with them, go something like this:

Friends are friends forever, if the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never 'cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go in the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not to long to live as friends.

Moving on, the song was played at countless end of whatever's to make the girls all cry about not seeing their friends in what seemed like a lifetime but what was, in actuality, about a 3 month summer vacation. I think the song took on so many different meanings to so many different people over time and, of course, to me, today, yet another.

It made me think a lot about friends and those that stick around and those that don't. The one's that give and the one's that only take. I'd like to think that I've always given in my friendships but I'm sure there's someone out there that only saw me as a taker. I hope it's not true but I wouldn't be surprised if it were. I know I've been the giver on many occasions and I try to take my turn as the taker but sometimes it's hard to even admit that you NEED to be a taker for a moment or two lest the other see you only as that. I had one friend that I remember thinking was my best friend in the whole world. She and I just got each other or so I thought. But then there was the fateful time when I needed her; REALLY needed her and she just wasn't there for me. And then I found out from a mutual friend that, whenever we were all out together and I would leave to just go to the bathroom, all kinds of foulness would spill from her mouth about me, much of which wasn't true. I ended that relationship and it has made me sad over the years but I also realize I'm much healthier for it.

Anyway, what the song REALLY made me think about the most, though, are the friends I had when I was in college. The Bible college. The college where we were all asked/told how "good" people acted and spoke and dressed; what we were to discuss and believe and not believe and how we should respond to __________ and...the list goes on. Well, I'm not the same girl I was then in many ways but I also AM the same girl I was back then in many ways. There was an "incident" after I finished school that caused me to fall from favor in the school's eyes and I basically told them to bite me. What was interesting, though, was the reaction from my "friends". There were those that stood right by my side. Never mind how they felt about the "incident"; they believed in ME and remained my friend. Those people were not necessarily in the majority, though. No, the vast majority just quietly shunned me. People who I thought were my friends wouldn't even say hello to me. Even when I said hello to them first. It was crazy and I would like to think that it was because we were all so young really and, well, stupid. What I've found over the years, though, is that age really has nothing to do with it.

In just the last year I've had the good fortune of finding several old friends online. It's always fun to find those people that meant so much to you when you were younger that you haven't seen or heard from in years. You've spent countless moments wondering what ever became of them, where they are, what they're doing, are they married, do they have children, etc. We find each other and it's all exciting until they ask me about where life has taken me in the last 15 or so years and I tell them. And then, it seems that because I don't fit the Bible college mold (which, by the by, is severely warped) that we were all being pressed into so many years ago, I am unworthy of a response. "Oh, gosh, well, I didn't know that you actually were a sinner. If I had known that, I probably wouldn't have been friends with you in the first place. Excuse me while I avoid responding to any of your emails." Umm...like I said in a previous post, we should all, ALL of us, be wearing alphabet sweaters if we're going to start pointing out the ways in which we have fallen short of perfection.

So, yeah...

Friends are friends forever, if the Lord's the Lord of them (unless of course you admit that you sin and, in that case, the Lord isn't the Lord of your friendship????)
And a friend will not say never 'cause the welcome will not end (unless you are not perfect because then I don't want to associate myself with you because other people might think less of me and it's all about how I look to others!)
Though it's hard to let you go in the Father's hands we know (actually, it is pretty easy to flake on you but..."I'll pray for you")
That a lifetime's not too long to live as friends (unless you are caring and giving and make me laugh and have always been supportive of me but choose to be honest about what's happened to you in the last 15 years; then all bets are off)

On the flip side of all of this, though, are the friends that are still my friends; both the people that I've been in touch with all through the last 15 and those that I've reconnected with that understand that life happens and you just are who you are. Because I'm still smart and can have an intellectual conversation with you that will leave us both feeling like we didn't just waste the last half hour of our lives. Because I'm still damn funny and I can make you laugh and, chances are, you make me laugh, too; maybe even enough to make me snort or cry or pee. Because you know that you could call me in the middle of the night because you just needed someone to talk to and that I would listen. Because I'd still give to you whatever I could to make your life better. Because I still remember the value of a friend. The people that remember all of that, they are the people from my past that I'm finding mean the most to me. Why? Because they are the friends that never said never and who's welcome did not end.

"Of course, you don't believe in abortion..."

As some folks know, I've been looking for a part-time job (or two) recently. Having both breadwinners in the house being self-employed kind of sucks in a down economy. Add to that the fact that one of them is in real estate and it's an even bigger hit. I've been working at home for four years and it's hard to think of going back to a real job. One of the first things the kids said to me was, "Does this mean you're not going to be a stay at home mom anymore?" That'll break your heart into about a thousand and one pieces right there. I've been there when someone got sick and didn't have to "arrange" to work from home to take care of them. I've been there for field trips and picking up from school and all of that. It's been marvelous and I'm doing everything in my power to STILL be able to do all of those things.

Anyway, I recently went to an interview for a job that I'm fairly certain I won't get just because I was honest and I don't fit the mold they're looking for. Whatever. It was for a part time admin for a Christian non profit. Honestly, working for a religious based organization would never be my first choice of job but I did think that, despite the religious bent, what they are doing is a fantastic thing and well needed. Anyone that knows me...REALLY knows me...knows that, despite my distance from any organized church and my unwillingness to identify with any one church, I still have faith, I still believe in God, I still believe the Bible is His inspired Word, etc. Given my experiences with God's people, though, in the last 15 or so years, I've certainly lost faith in THEM in general. I have, in fact, found more compassion and acceptance from what some would call the most God-LESS people over the last several years. What I have seen from "God's people" is hypocricy to it's fullest extent. What makes a group of people so quick to brand another as unworthy? Aren't we all sinners? Don't we all have a scarlet letter to wear? Let's see, that's A for Adultry, B for Blasphemy, C for Coveting... Let's be honest, we should all be wearing Sesame Street alphabet shirts.

Anyway, I'm climbing higher and higher onto a soapbox and diverging from the actual incident that precipitated this blog. What else is new, right? So, I'm in this interview because (A) my availability suits the position, (B) I have office administration skills that, quite frankly, would rock any boss's world, and (C) my resume shows that I graduated from a private Bible college that is one of, if not THE, best in the nation. So, I'm being interviewed and we're talking about my skills and I'm letting them know how I would manage the tasks they have and how my skills would be a tremendous help to them (I'm not lying here, they really would be) and we get to the religious part. Because they are a non profit, they can ask those kinds of questions and I knew they would come up.

So, the first question out of the gate is, "Tell me about your walk with Christ." Hmmm...my "walk with Christ"? I love cliches. I don't like to think of it so much as a "walk" but more of a journey. Sometimes we drive, sometimes we skip, sometimes we power walk, sometimes we just lay in bed and think about the situps we should be doing. Anyway, I tell the woman that "to be honest, it's been about...16 years since I've been to church." THAT freaked her out. "Oh," she says, "uh...OH." I explained why; I explained how some of God's "higher ranking" people have treated me in various situations; I explained that, when it all comes down to it, it's about a personal relationship (for lack of a better, non cliche-ish phrase) than it is about being "right" in someone else's eyes. I explained that I didn't believe that God cared whether I wore all black on a regular basis or not. That He doesn't care if I love to go dancing. That he doesn't care if my hair is purple or my head is half shaved (it's not, by the way, but what would it matter if it was?); that being friends with someone doesn't have to mean you espouse to everything they do and vice versa. Anywho, she seemed satisfied enough with my answer to not count me out yet and move on.

The next statement/question, though, is where this all comes together. It's one of a few hot buttons for me in the religious community and I'm sure they're still talking about "that one woman that came in for an interview". Good. I hope they talk a lot about me and what I had to say because I think it bears contemplating. She says, "Of course, you don't believe in abortion then?" She says it less like a question than a statement. I'm sure she was sure of what my Bible girl answer would be. Her face, though, upon hearing my reply, was stunning. "Actually," I said quite confidently and matter of factly, "I'm pro choice." Silence. Add an H for heretic to my letterman's sweater. I explained that I felt it was wrong for the government, ANY government, to tell a person what they could or couldn't do with their own body. *sidebar - yes, I know that the argument goes that the woman is doing something not to HER body but to someone else's but, let's be honest, if you're laying on a bed with your feet in stirrups, something's being done to YOUR body.* I fell short of bringing up the Chinese government and how they regulate how many children a woman can have, etc. but explained that, when screaming and protesting and picketing about how pro choice is sooo wrong and Godless, I think too many people forget that the reason we even have choice over ANYTHING in our lives is because, right from the Bible they are beating upon, God GAVE it to us! Yes, that's right my "brothers and sisters in the Lord", choice is a God given right! I told her that I believe we are given a very big responsibility in being given the right to make our own choices and that many of the choices in front of us require us to use the brains in our heads to make the best decisions we can. However, that is OUR responsibility and not the government's. Did I really answer her question? No, not exactly; but that's not the point. The point is that too many Christians are still walking down a long, narrow path simply because of the enormous blinders they have been told to wear. I think I kind of scared this woman, though. Geez, give a girl a Bible education and then slap her in the face with it and it becomes a dangerous thing.

So, anyway, if you disagree with my position, that's totally cool. It's your choice. Right? I would ask of you, though, to consider for a moment your own children if you have any. Is your firstborn a girl? If so, consider throwing her in a river to drown. Do you have more than one child? Consider giving away all but the first boy. It sounds trite but I challenge you, if you dare, to really think about what you would feel if you were forced into that situation. Unable to choose the outcome of your family for yourself. It's so NOT about whether you believe abortion is right or wrong. It's about exercising your God given ability to choose and to make the best choice for yourself. Because only YOU can choose what is right for YOU. No one else can and no one else should choose what is right for another person's life.

Finally, the letter for the day is not C for Choice but T for Think. Being pro choice doesn't mean the same thing as being pro abortion. It means what it says. Pro CHOICE. Thank God for the choices you are able to make everyday. Your choice to decide what grocery store to go to. Your choice of what career path to follow. Your choice of housing and friends and clothing and... And, especially if you're a woman, thank the judicial system for Roe v. Wade and giving you your right to choose.

Olympic Soup - A Garnish

Silly me for posting my Olympic themed blog prior to the games even being over! Last night I saw something that made me laugh out loud.

So, it's 11:30 at night and I crawl into bed and decide what to fall asleep to. Yes, I fall asleep to TV. It's pathetic and I admit it. Anyway, I start scanning what's on using my handy dandy "guide" feature, which, by the way, I LOVE! Thank you, Comcast for not making me have to (A) look at EACH channel and then try to remember which ones looked interesting, and (B) keep track of some ridiculous paper guide that changes every week (although I do admit that, when we only had 5 channels, that was one of my favorite pieces of literature in the house. It was like my own personal organizer for the coming week).

Digression aside, I'm going through the guide and get to MSNBC and see that the games are still on. Now, honestly, MSNBC and CNBC really air mostly the strange and weird of the Olympics. The fairly normal, mainstream coverage goes to NBC and these two offshoots seem to be treated as the ugly, redhaired stepchildren. This is, of course, where I watched the aforementioned presentation of Dancing With the Horses and the grisly accident scene called Men's Speed Walking, so it really should have been no huge surprise to find some other Olympic anomoly. Anyway, I tune in just as the announcer (some woman that I have never seen or heard of before...of course) states that they will be joining the Men's Open Swim competition in progress. "Great!" I muse, "Never seen this before; it can't be all that strange since it's just guys swimming, right?" Wrong.

OK, the guys swimming is not so weird but the first shot is an aerial one that shows the pod of thrashing bodies in the water. It kind of looked like a school of flying fish buzzing along. Arms coming up here and there only to dive back down to the depths without so much as a wave or OK sign. "Not so bad," I'm thinking. Then we go to a more water level shot. Apparently the camera is on a boat or something that is stationed a bit ahead of the swimmers. In the foreground, though, are a bunch of Chinese men standing on a dock with metal poles out over the water. What the hell? As the swimmers get closer to the dock, these little men begin wildly waving their poles over the water (that didn't sound right). Just very weird. It looks like they're fishing. Everyone jockeying for position because the flying fish are spawning and, if you're going to fish for flying fish, of course your pole must be above the water in the air so that they can grab at the bait as they glide by, right? At this point I begin wondering about what kind of bait one uses for flying fish. Worm? Corn? Fly??? aahh hahahahaha I crack myself up; spent too much time working in the fishing industry, I guess.

Anyhoo...the swimmers approach, the poles begin waving, the Chinese men begin yelling and then it happens... FISH ON!! A flying fish arm comes leaping from the water and grabs at the pole! Again, what the hell? Is it like tag team open water swimming? One after another, the ends of the poles are grabbed at and I begin to notice that something is being removed from those poles. Just when I'm fully confused, the commentator announces that it's really important to keep one's calorie count up during long races like this, so the swimmers are snagging some food. ????? Yes, they're paper cups filled with some kind of foodstuff. So, they were fishing and they did have bait!! The best part is that they even call the little dock that they were standing on to fish a feeding station!!! How weird is THAT?? Now I'm all curious about what they're eating, though, and just how does one hack down some granola or something whilst swimming at breakneck speed? And, where do they throw the cup when they're done? Is there a designated river skimmer that goes out and nets them all after the school has passed? So many questions...

So, one more Olympic event that I don't really understand. I won't even get into the fact that swimming in a river in China sounds icky to me. Didn't these boys ever read The Yellow River by I.P. Freely? Eeeww...

PS. It has been suggested that I be a correspondent during the next Olympic games. To that, I say, Bring It ON!! That would be so cool! Maybe Colbert needs someone to fill that position. That would be fun.

Olympic Soup

Olympic Soup

Oh, it's been so long since I've blogged! How have any of you survived? ; )

So, the title of today's blog is Olympic Soup because, like soup, it contains a little bit of everything regarding my thoughts on the Olympics. I confess that I am an Olympics junkie. I'll watch almost any competition at least for a little while. I was so excited when they went to an every-two-years format so that I only have to wait 2 years between getting to spend 2 weeks out of my year plastered to the TV. OK, realistically, that happens other times but it usually involves some reality show marathon that I'm too embarrassed to share with you that I watch. Have I mentioned that Bret Michaels is still hot to look at? ahem... as always, I digress...

So, the first ingredient in Olympic Soup is, of course, fashion! What was up with those outfits the US wore in the opening ceremonies? It's like 90 degrees outside with 97% humidity and they dress them in suits and those ridiculous hats? The chick on Project Runway that won the Olympic wear challenge did a better job in my opinion. I KNOW someone threatened those athletes with bodily harm in order to (A) get them to wear the hats and (B) wear them the right way. I didn't see a single hat cocked to the side or worn backward, either of which would have been an enormous improvement. I'd like to thank, though, whoever designed the men's swimming outfits. A departure from Speedo's is always welcome. Might we find something with a little more cool factor for the indoor women cyclists to wear on their heads, though, than the alien looking helmets they currently don? Seriously, it looks like the alien head from all the Alien movies. I expect a disgruntled cyclist to have a secondary mouth come out of her face and eat an opponent.

You be the judge.

Ingredient number two for a good Olympic Soup is multiple flavors (countries). Now, here's where I get a little cranky. I love the fact that so many countries are represented and that there appears to be such an international flavor to the games. For the most part, everyone seems to be pretty chummy, too, and showing loads of good sportsmanship. However, what's the deal with all these people competing for other countries that otherwise live and train in the US? Uh...if you were born, yes born, in the US, live in the US and train in the US, why would you compete for another country? Oh, there's the fact that your parents were born there, but YOU weren't. You don't live there; you don't train there, so why represent them? I don't get that. I can trace my family tree back to Sweden but I wouldn't compete for them in the Olympics. Seriously, if you live, train and otherwise compete here why not represent the place you have already said by your actions is your destination of choice? Maybe the reason you don't train in your "home" country is because anyone worth their salt doesn't train there because the country's training sucks. If the training there sucks so bad, stick around and improve it since you're such a stellar athlete. There's one chick from Australia that went to college in the US, was a roommate and teammate of US athletes, and has now lived in the US and trained at a US facility for the last eight years. EIGHT YEARS!!! I just don't get that. Either be Australian or not. Talk about wishy washy. So, yeah, that kind of irks me. Maybe the reason everyone has been so nice to each other is that they really are used to hanging out together on a regular basis anyway.

The third and final ingredient is multiple events. I've seen some this year that I didn't even know existed. I watched some of the equestrian competition, which I expected to be some kind of riding thing like you see snobby English people do - you know, jumping over bars and moats and stuff - but was surprised to find that it's about the horse more than it is about the rider. Basically, it's the floor exercise for horses. They prance around and do all kinds of little steps that, honestly, I've never seen a horse do before but that's beside the point. I found it to be an elevated version of Stupid Pet Tricks. Yeah, yeah, the horse will only do this if the rider gives them the proper cues but so do racing pigs, right? When will that be an Olympic sport. Or maybe the dog competitions with those border collies that run through the obstacle course as fast as lightening. They're just following cues, right? So, how is the horse thing any different? I found it ridiculous.

Another sport that I tuned into by accident that was a little disturbing to watch? Men's 20k speed walking. It's bad enough to watch one person do that hitchy speed walking thing but to watch a whole herd of them is weird. Kind of like a freak show that you know you shouldn't watch because it would be disrespectful but you're nonetheless transfixed. I find it all so odd. I swear I'm going to see one of them dislocate a hip someday.

And, that brings me to sports I'd like to see at the Olympics. How about competitive TP'ing? My own home was hit for the first time shortly before the opening ceremonies. It was a fine job and now I know why I was awoken to a thumping on the roof somewhere around 3am.

My thought is that the judging can be somewhat like the gymnastics judging. First you get a score based on difficulty. This particular job I would give a 5.8. Then you start out with a perfect 10 for execution and receive deductions from there. So, with a potential overall score of 15.8, I would give this project a final score of 14.95. The picture doesn't do it justice but there were beautiful tails dancing in the breeze from the tree branches. Truth be told, there's still some there today. However, there were two rolls that were not completely used and the empty tubes that were there were not used as creatively as they could of been. Really, I think this would be a great Olympic sport. There could be an individual competition, team, relays, etc. It involves creative skill, athletic ability and the ever important stealth.

I think there should be a rifle competition that involves a potato gun, too. A homemade potato gun. Not only must you be skilled in the construction but you must overcome any shortcomings your gun may have such as sighting a bit to the left for instance. Make the stakes even higher and require that the athletes grow and harvest their own potatoes! Multiple skills represented, engineering ability required...it all seems quite plausible.

There should be ice blocking. Of course, that would be in the winter games, though. Again, lots of room for different competitions with this. Individual, team, relay... There could be competitions based on speed as well as creative/artistic presentation. It's a no brainer. If you've ever been ice blocking before, you know that there is a fair amount of athletic ability that factors in. You have to be able to balance on something rather small, you have to be able to keep your legs up in the air for the duration of the run, you have to choose the best course, etc. Injuries do occur, too, so that makes it officially athletic in nature.

So, now you have Olympic Soup. All you need now is an appropriate label. Thank you, NBC for providing one for me so I didn't have to spend time creating one in Microsoft Paint! Honestly, the first time I saw this on the TV screen, I thought it was a Campbell's Soup label. Look away and then just glance at it again. Campbell's Soup all the way. Replace the 2008 with the word "soup", change the "Beijing" to "Olympic", lose the peacock and it's done!

Olympic Soup...it's mmm, mmm good!

Guest Who Don't Show

Aaaahhhh...I love reading old blogs. I had totally forgotten about this one. This is from back around Christmas time of '05. I know, I know...ancient days ago, but this is priceless. Ryan is still irked at people that don't keep their word.

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So, my 4 year old goes to a private preschool/daycare place. They aren't religiously affiliated in anyway but they are old school and don't worry to much about being PC. This winter they put on a Christmas pageant and 2 days ago the kids had a Christmas party at school where they were able to bring treats and stuff. Today was the Happy Birthday Jesus party for the kids put on by the teachers.

Yesterday Ryan tells me he's really looking forward to going to school today because they're having the Happy Birthday Jesus party and "I've never met him before so I really want to see him!" Priceless. I told him I wasn't sure if Jesus would actually be able to BE at the party since he was born sooooo long ago. "Mom," he says, as if I'm completely retarded, "that's just a story."

So, he goes to school today and I pick him up at noon and ask how the party went. He is completely pissed when I mention it and indignintly states, "He wasn't even there!" I'm with him...I hate it when invited guests don't show; so rude.

Must Be Doing Something Right

Today is my 10th anniversary. This morning my 7 year old brought my husband and I a card that he insisted I buy 2 weeks ago but was not allowed to see. He had taken the card to his brothers and had them each sign the card, too. It was truly precious as none of our kids have ever "done" anything for us for our anniversary in the past.

So, my oldest son (15) writes in the card, "You two have taken good care of us. You two have gone through the good, the bad and and ugly for us. Yet, we still don't see any of it and don't care." What a gift! He knows that we really have gone through some ugly situations in the past but we've always made our family the first priority. He also knows that during the good times, the family is the first to sop up the outpouring of generosities.

I looked at my husband and told him that we must be accomplishing what we set out to do with this family of ours. To insulate them from what they should never have to worry themselves about as children and to nurture them into the fine young thoughtful men that they are. That's about the most perfect gift we could ever ask for.

You Can't Always Get What You Want

Here's a blog from back in '05...the beginning of the MySpace blog migration I promised. Short but sweet and definitely something that is timeless in its lesson. And, while I'm currently in one of those "not getting what I want" phases in life, despite the crap that is swirling around me in my toilet bowl of life (sorry, that's not a very nice mental picture now that I think about it), it's probably just what I need. Alright, now the mental picture just became worse and I'm even icked out. Apologies.
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So, I'm at one of my rentals yesterday doing some work (and it needs lots of it) and I'm listening to the radio as I sit in the stairway and paint. On comes The Stones. I confess I've never been much of a Stones fan so I've never really paid much attention to their lyrics or anything. But, sitting in the stairway painting - a task that appears not to have been done in somewhere around 15 years - I took a real listen.

What I came away with was...you can't always get what you want, but if you try real hard, you might just get what you need...or something relatively close to that. Hmm...profound. So many times I haven't gotten what I wanted; however, I've generally ended up with something that I looked back and said, "Ah, I get it now...what I got was actually what I needed as a human being at the time." Important lesson.

Case in point, I have 3 boys. What on earth I would ever do with icky ol' boys I wasn't sure. I desperately wanted a girl; sobbed each time I learned I was having a boy. Looking back, though, I find that I have no idea what I would have done with one if I had gotten one. I like girly things but I have no patience for the prissy, girly, I-have-to-have-these-shoes-to-go-with-this-purse-and-I-need-this-hair-thing-to-match-and.... business. I'm better with dirt and bugs and blue jeans and boots. Better yet, I realized that I retained the status of being the only female in the house; a position that relish.

No, you can't always get what you want. But, if you try real hard, you just might get what you need.

After saying to myself for several months that I was going to start a blog here, I finally have. Have been blogging at MySpace for quite some time but there are plenty of people out there that are connected to me that DON'T have a MySpace and this just seems like an easier place for them to find my blogs. I'll start transferring over some of the older blogs I have there to here in the next few weeks but until then there will just be my general ramblings here.

Currently, my life feels like it's in upheaval. I just realized how much the word upheaval makes me think of throwing up and, now that I think of it, that's kind of what life has felt like for about the last month. Just a bunch of life vomit. Not that it's all been bad but it certainly could be better. You know how when you're puking your guts out and there's someone there to hold your hair? Well, it's good that you've got someone holding your hair but, in general, you wish you could be somewhere else.

So, yeah, the vomit part is that my own computer has been dead for just over a month. I'm using my husband's computer in the meantime - as are he and the 3 children - and it's just a real pain in the butt. Makes it hard to run an internet business when the only computer at your disposal is often at someone else's office all day and then you have to fight the offspring for the use of it once it does make an appearance. It's completely thrown me out of my regular routine, too, so that, in turn, has thrown everything else out of whack. Plus, the kids are home all day since it's summer. I just can't get into the swing of things yet and I've been dealing with this for the last 5 weeks! I'm sure it will all fall into place the day before school starts.

On the "holding my hair" side of things, we got to go visit family over 4th of July and we all went camping. That was uber cool as the boys had never really done "real" camping. Hahahaha...I say "real" like we were out in the middle of nowhere with a flint and a roll of duct tape. We were at a campground with real toilets and all but we were in tents and sleeping on the ground and cooking on campstoves and stuff. Anyway, we were at a lake and did wakeboarding and riding waverunners and stuff and that was completely cool. One more thing to check off my list of things I can do...drive a waverunner. Woohoo! We've also had some around home kind of fun this year like trips to the library, picking fresh raspberries, planting a garden and stuff like that.


So, the summer hasn't been a total loss and, frankly, maybe the computer crashed as a way of telling me that I needed to focus on other things for awhile, which is OK. The computer is supposed to be back on Sunday, though. Then I'll get to focus on how to pay for the repair!